Joe & Friends Episode 3_Freya and Joe Fuck Things Up: things get revealed at Mardi Gras by loving_geek

Rating: 50%, Read 7533 times, Posted Mar 02, 2014

Fiction | Cum Swallowing, Drug, Exhibitionism, Reluctance

Freya and Joe Fuck Things Up: things get revealed at Mardi Gras (MF, rom, exhib, “disfigured”, cheat, booze, oral, creampie)


Unlike Part #2, this does lean heavily on Cancer Free For 62 months (but almost nothing in Part two is important, not even that Professor Sabin and Professora Jackson were lovers).

PS: I would love comments on this story, but spammers have abused the anonymous comments privilege. PM me comments, please.


Freya got a feel for how much gas Joe’s hybrid burned and when mardi gras rolled around. They snuck off together. Freya called her parents to say “I won’t be on campus, but I’ll have my cel with me.” She was inside the gas station's convenience store handing over her parents credit card so he could fill up his nearly empty gas tank when she said this. She didn’t own a car anymore, she owned a motorbike. “Joe and I are taking Joe’s car and I’m spotting the first tank of gas. When you look at the statement, that’ll be the 7 to 10 gallons of gas on the card today... the same station I tank up about half the time at.” She hung up and climbed in before Joe. Freya had a first cousin Joanna, with whom she never got along (but they pretended to at family gatherings). Joanna attended the same college Freya did (her cousin wanted to be an elementary school teacher which all but assured them they’d have no classes together). Freya’s first roommate, and almost lesbian experience, was Josephine (both women she'd referred to as 'Jo' at least once.

She talked to her mother some about Joe, but always called him Josephus (his full first name) to differentiate him from her ex-roomie and first cousin. Freya’s mother, Reynalda, was a homophobe. They arrived at the hotel without incident in the afternoon. They weren’t hungry yet, so they went to the room, stripped naked and kissed, not noticing the open curtains at first. When Freya did, she covered her breast and breast-void and told Joe to close the curtains. Joe complied, then opened her legs.

He began his muff dive. He lapped at her pussy and pressed his lips as close to her clit as he dared as he issued a tuneless hum. She ran fingers through his curly hairs (the brown ones coming out of his scalp) as she moaned, “Fucking good hummer.”

“Freya... I’ve been curious about something.”

“What?... why say it like that?”

“You’ll probably say Fuck no.”

“Try me.”

“I want to eat you until you’re just wet enough to fuck, then fuck you till I leave a huge wad of cum and finally clean your pussy out.”

“What Summer’s Eve or something?”

“No, a little something I like doing called cunlingus.”

“You want to cum in my pussy, then eat your own cum... that’s so narcissistic. Not tonight. Wait at least a month until you ask me again? Come, let me kiss you.”

She didn’t let him lick or fuck her. She shivered in disgust. Joe felt humiliated and utterly rejected. At first blush, to Freya, this made him seem self-important and narcissistic. She disliked tasting herself and couldn’t imagine anyone with a different attitude. She now wondered if he was her best friend because he was ‘a girl’s best friend’ (No, not diamonds and not cats or dogs, but the kind of man who really loves his fellow men). Joe felt utterly rejected, but when she cuddled him, he misperceived it as a goodbye hug.

Joe finally got up the courage to ask, “Are you breaking up with me?”

“I can never see a time when we’re not friends. Your last three sex requests have gotten progressively weirder. For anal I turned you down just because you’re too big or at least your cock is way to big to go up my asshole. Watching me pee and not wanting me to piss on you. Let me warm up to that. That last thing you asked... no fucking way. I can’t see how and no, don’t surprise me with going down on me after you cream in my pussy.” Joe thought they’d just broken up ‘friends’ is the kiss of death for a former lover. It was nice while it lasted, and at least he could still get help with liberal arts shit. He could never have gotten as good of a grade in art appreciation if she hadn’t helped him through it (Joe could do multivariable calculus in his head, flow chart 2000 lines of code in his head but didn’t have his mind wired to pass art appreciation -- In Joe's estimation, this was the most fucked up thing about his mind).

Truth be known, she knew in her heart she’d keep him, but she was too disgusted with today’s request to say anything. They walked to a small restaurant in the quarter. Then they went to a club for drinks. Joe and Freya each had a key to their room. A girl named Jezebel, bullshit she was a woman about one and three-quarters times his age (31 years), started buying Joe drinks. Freya watched this, she was pissed but lacked the courage to challenge him publicly. Joe seemed willing but Jezebel asked, “Who’d you walk in with, Joe?”

“Freya... wonderful friend of mine. We just broke up, we took each other’s virginity. She’s... I’d have failed the art course I took had she not helped me.” The art course was the art appreciation course and knew too many people found it simple to mention which art course.

Freya saw the conversation and got more jealous, but saw a gorgeous man get slapped by a woman followed by a full draft bear dumped in his lap followed the beermug being spiked at his groin, a quick pivot of his lower body left him with a huge, deep bruise forming on his thigh (which was better than the ruptured testicle that would have happened had the woman hit her target). Freya made her move. “I know some men like it when a woman leaves them with a big amount of wetness on their groin, but maybe not this way. I’m Freya.”

“Hank.” He was surprised.

“So, I presume you might honestly call it a learning experience of sorts.”

“I’m not sure.”

“What’d you learn?”

“That she wasn’t going to fuck me an hour after meeting me.”

She sighed, “Look, I want to make my semi-ex boyfriend there jealous.”

“Okay... What if it backfires?”

“One way or another I need a lay.” Freya kissed Hank with tongue. Hank got to taste some liquor on her kiss.

“How many drinks have you had?”

She thought... “Three, a huge glass of Sprite, just now. I before had an ice tea from New York and local specialty... hurricane. I made sure the tea was decaf because I really don’t need caffeine this late at night, y’know?”

“The iced tea... was it a Long Island iced tea?”

“That’s the shit!” She practically shouted. Her voice was quieter but still practically echoed through the small bar, “I gotta tinkle... B.R.B.” She staggered off to the men’s room. From the bathroom she shouted, “One of us is in the wrong toilet.”

A man replied, “You are, but if you wanna use the urinal... I’ll hold you up.”

“T’ank’s for the offer, but I’ll in the other toilet.” She walked out of the men’s room and into the women’s room.

Joe shook his head. After she exited, she said, “Fuck off.” to Joe’s face quietly as she passed.

Hank asked, “See anything you like?”

“I must be really fucked... I walk into the men’s room and I don’t see dick, not even a shrunken head dick.” She said too loud. She whispered, “Babe, I really need a dick preferably a thick one 15 to 20 cm.”

“How long’s that?”

“15 to 20 cm.”

“Show me with your hands.”

She held her hands apart some random distance less than a foot apart. “I can’t... too drunk... not easily... a 30 cm dick is a foot long sausage.”

“So, a half to two-thirds... 6 to 8 inches, okay. I may give you a little lagniappe on the long end.”

“Not too much... A friend got me a 9 inch dildo that really hurt when I shoved it in all the way.”

“Do you any limits, do you want me to use a rubber? Any sex acts your really don’t want?” Hank believed he was somewhere between 0.069% and 0.075% blood alcohol -- not drunk in his home state but damn close. Because he was as experienced drinker as he was and his last two drinks were root beer. He was closer 0.05%.

“There’s only two things: don’t stick anything up my ass, not even a stinky finger or any other kind of finger for that matter. Other thing.” She paused long enough to be a full sentence, “Have you ever heard about someone cumming in a girl’s cunt then do a muff dive?”

“Yes, I’ve done that, actually.”

“Don’t! Not with me... disgusting.”

“Let’s walk. My room or yours?”

“Mine. Corner of...” She spoke the corner nearest her hotel. Her hotel wasn’t on a corner, but it was close to the corner she said. Just after they passed the doorman, “We’re looking for...” she spoke the correct name for her hotel. “It’s near here, I feel it in my cunt.”

Hank asked the doorman quietly, “Is this the...[hotel name omitted].” The doorman nodded. Hank gave him 5 bucks and said, “Keep up the good work.”

Freya was pissed and horny... and drunk. Freya said, “I’m messy and I am not putting a beer soaked cock in any hole.”

“Let’s shower together.”

“Okay. Do you want to get naked, first?”

“Sure, do you?”

“Might as well.” Freya was falling down drunk (her blood alcohol was beyond 11 grams per liter). She fell on her ass when she tried to take off her shoes. She stayed seated and asked for help undressing.

Naked, Hank genuflected before her and helped her undress. She was very shy about taking her top off and Hank talked to her in sweet, nonjudgmental tones. He talked her right out of her titsling. Hank was much more surprised than shocked at seeing one tit missing. Freya burst into tears. Hank begged forgiveness.

“I never saw a mastectomy before and it surprised me.”

“Disgusted you, you mean!”

“It surprised me.” He wasn't sure if he should lie, but decided he should focus on the surprise aspect.

“I look as good as if I had two breasteses?”

He wasn't going to say 'no', he wasn't sure if he could lie convincingly, “You are beautiful as you are. Still want that shower?”


Let’s shower.

As soon as they are under the water, Joe unlocked the door. Jezebel Frenched Joe before the door slammed. “Key... grab the key please.”


“Check the door.”

She opened the door and pulled it out, “Got it.”

“Good, on the TV please... the key I mean.”

“Okay.” Jezebel went to wash her hands. “There’s someone in the shower.”

“Don’t worry about them.” He jumped back to another subject in disbelief, “Are you serious... you are willing to let me do that?”

“I’ve begged guys to do that to me, but I had to get a nearly gay bi-friend drunk to get that. I can’t believe she broke up with you over that.”

“I’d be willing to do it sober.”

“Where do you live?”

“On campus...” He rattled off his university’s initials plus city and state it was in.

“Oh... Let’s get naked.” She was sober enough to legally drive just about anywhere but Sweden. They’re naked quickly. Joe was technically sober enough to drive his car in the French Quarter without getting a DUI, but he never tasted alcohol before, beside he’d rather ride this Jezebel than his car right now.

“Jezebel, yours are the first in tact pair of naked tits I’ve ever laid hands on.” He gently caressed her C-cups.”

“You’ve not touched you’re friends tits?”

“Tit. She’s survived cancer and endured a mastectomy. She’s still pissed and self-conscious about it. I’m sure that factored in our break up somehow, but I know my curiosity and desire to experiment alienated her. If you’ll allow me, let’s see how wet you are... ooh, nice.”

“You’re not fully hard yet.”

“I don’t know why he’s a slow riser, tonight. Maybe it’s the booze.”

“I’ll fluff him.” She pulled him from a hunched over to a standing position. She remained seated on the edge of the bed. She took his cock in and sucked the head, licked and moaned in pleasure (deliberately overacting). He plumped. She rolled over the bed stood on the other side, “I thought your idea over, fuck me standing up.” She put her feet wide and hands against the wall. He took a moment to find her pussy in this position, but she was tight. He groped her tits and hammer fucked her naked pussy with a naked cock.

Freya’s eyes narrowed when she saw Joe. “You asshole!... not getting my cunt tonight, Josephus!.” She grabbed Hank and somehow executed a perfect hip toss despite being drunk and having only 3 weeks or judo lessons half-a-lifetime ago. She spread his legs went to her knees and sucked Hank hard.

Joe decided the best way to deal with Freya’s rant was to fuck Jezebel. He needed a moment and her help to get his cock up her twat. But her 6’ frame and long gams made it easier to mount her with her feet spaced broadly, He reached around and massaged her breasts. One rough grope then switching to tender squeezes and pets that could have gotten her close to creaming in short order. Jezebel just took Joe’s cock. She made sounds like she enjoyed it a little more than she really did, but this was the only time she’d ever gotten fucked in the ‘frisk her’ position and came close to cumming.

Freya locked eyes with Hank and said, “Just warn me before you cum. I’ll either swallow or surrender control to let you cream anyone or my skin you can squirt on.” She wrapped two fists around his cock and licked the little circumcised head that peaked above it. She took that head in completely and slobbered. She had the oddest feeling in her abdomen... not quite period pains (she almost never got those, although it’s about time for something like that to happen, if this was an accurate assessment, her bloody week approaching). She removed one hand and took his cock in up to her fist. Sucking him hard and gulping air. For a moment she was more wobbly than she had been, then her wobbles stopped. Suddenly she knew what the pain had been she stood, fell next to Hank, stood again and stumbled to the sink to puke up what she later called a strawberry Long Island hurricane (a Long Island iced tea and a strawberry-flavored hurricane). She puked a second time to get all of it up.

She rinsed her mouth with tap water then the entire sample bottle of mouthwash (about a weekend's worth for one person). "Lay next to me for a moment." Hank drew a large glass of water and returned to bed, glass in hand.

Joe whispered, “I want you to think of the best single lay you’ve ever had. I want you to remember every detail you can. Don’t tell me, just relive it in your mind.” Jezebel obeyed remembered her first lesbian foursome (that became a fivesome in mid-party). It was her first time hitting third base with a woman and her first strapon sex. The memory of four mouths french kissing both lips and sucking both breasts just made her cum so hard. Joe’s cock erupted as Freya spewed (he was oblivious to Freya’s vomiting until later). Jezebel pressed herself full body against the wall, moaning in pleasure and exhaustion. Joe was up behind her, his shrinking prick still up her puss. Joe kissed her neck and licked the base of her neck. Jezebel moaned in pure pleasure, both slender J’s oblivious to Freya’s suffering.

Hank treated Freya gently. Encouraged her to drink water. He took a minute out to piss. He assisted her with her toothbrush and she pissed before climbing into bed with him.

Joe spun Jezebel so her back was against the wall, pushed her legs farther apart and ate her cunt like a possessed dyke still learning how to eat pussy. “Joe, I’m bi with more female experience, but I have to say, you’re eating better than one or two of the dykes I’ve had... and these weren’t virgins wondering if they belonged on the all girls’ team, either.” Jezebel didn’t fully believe the statement, but she hoped praising him would get him to go from good to great.

“Thank you.”

He’d never attempted to give a muff dive to a standing woman before. After a few minutes his neck was beginning to get sore. He pointed to the bed, “Why don’t you lay down.” He stood and made the bed (at least to pull the sheets smooth where he wanted her ass). Once she was on the bed with her legs splayed, he took a pillow for a kneeler and decided to go down long time.

“Sit next to me, let me massage that neck.” She spread her legs and her hairy pussy pressed against his ass and as close to the bottom of his spine as it could be. She massaged his neck and it felt much better.

“Thank you”

“Please finish me... after you do we can do anything you want, except anal and scat.”

“I doubt I’d like anal but I’d like to try it once, some day.”

“Not in my ass you won’t.”

“Scat doesn’t sound fun. What is it?”

“Getting shitted on.”

“No... if I never get that, I’ll have lived a fuller sex life: That’s how unsex it is to me.”

“Stop talk and start licking, Joe.” Joe went down without fanfare or posturing. He just started licking slurping and breathing on her wet pussy lips. She leaned back and luxuriated. “Good job; keep at it.” She said with an almost distracted or stoned lilt to her voice. She was feeling something and although she had better from several lovers, only one of those cunt lickers was born with testicles. She focused on the positive and whispered encouragement and praise.

“Oh, fuck, good boy.” The same stoned/distracted lilt remained. She soon reached between her legs and ran her hands though Joe’s curly hairs (the ones coming out of his scalp). Joe was getting harder from her fingers running though his hair than anything else. The speed and force she used to pull his face into her crotch surprised him, the only way he could breathe was through his mouth. “Lick it... It’s been too long since I’ve gotten this.” She grabbed a pillow with her off hand as her left held his head against her puss. She dropped the pillow on her face and let go as Joe finished her. She held the pillow hard against her face as she screamed and Joe didn’t stop.

She struggled for breath between orgasms and for a moment she thought she might actually have orgasms until she suffocated. She was young enough to think that cumming and going like this wasn’t a bad note to end on. She then felt a severe and momentary sharp pain (or pains?) on her left outer labium. Joe had pulled his tongue and a jaw muscle and instinctually with drew his tongue, closed his mouth and moaned. His right canine teeth nicked her labium.

Joe crawled up to her, peaked under her pillow. “Two questions, what did I do well and where can I improve?” His voice betrayed some emotional discomfort.

“You bit me?” More of a statement than question (although she inflected her voice as if she were asking).

He nodded.

She wagged a finger, “Not unless she’s really into S and M. As for what you did well, got a week?”

She cuddled with him and promised him a long slow blow job in the morning. Jezebel's crotch was sore from being held spread as he ate, but on balance, she’d gladly take a pulled groin for all the pleasure he gave out. Her jaw slacked when she glanced at the clock and realized he was muff diving for 39 to 45 minutes, she split the difference and tried to make a joke involving 'the answer' from A Douglas Adams novel but couldn't get the wording. She grabbed her purse pulled out a pink Sharpie and spelled out her private email address on his lower right leg such that if he put his ankle on his left knee he could easily read the address.

She was awake and buzzing. Joe collapsed in a heap and slept without a pillow. She thought about giving him a long drawn out blow job right then and there (he deserved one, if not two for all he put out).

Freya nodded off intermittently, “Hank?”

“What, Freya?”

“I wore out. Mind if I wake you with fellatio when I’m ready to fuck?”

“Fellatio?....” Hank struggled to place the term he heard it’s meaning once and his first reaction was to agree, but he was a bit scared to agree to participate in something he didn’t know the definition of.


Hank played dumb, “But you don’t have a cock for me to suck.”

Freya slapped his left pec loudly and playfully, “I mean suck your dick.”

“Oh, that’s even better.”

“Let’s switch sides.”

Hank let Freya take the side closer to the bathroom (they were already on the bed closer to the bathroom). Hank didn’t notice anything odd until he realized he didn’t have her right breast squishing against his arm, but that was only because she didn’t have a right breast.

“I suggest the first thing you do when you wake up is drink at least one glass of water, not coffee, not tea, not coke or any other sodapop but water.”

“Okay, why?”

“Getting drunk really dries you out, drinking water replaces the water and drinking caffeinated shit dries you out some.”

“Okay.” Freya was more mentally malleable when drunk, but this argument would have worked on her sober.

Hank got up and washed his hands then put some of her toothpaste on his finger and used it in lieu of a toothbrush. He had no uncertainty walking naked in the room. Jezebel stole a glance as did Joe. But Jezebel kept with Joe and this made him feel good (after all Hank’s cock had at least 2 inches on his, or as Joe would phrase it: ‘5 to 8 cm’). After Freya cuddled up with her ripped, five foot four, well hung bedwarmer, Joe and Jezebel fucked more quietly. No one bothered to turn the lights off. Freya didn’t ask, Hank didn’t ask and Jezebel didn’t ask. Joe wanted to drink in Jezebel's body. He wasn’t that much of a breast man until he handled her naked milkjugs).

After noticing Joe waking and looking for something, Jezebel put her back to the other bed and asked, “So, what attracted you?”


“To me?”

“This is going to sound crass.”

“Neither of us knows each other’s last name or birthday but we know what each other’s genitals taste like... I doubt you can be more crass that we’ve just been.”

“Well, since you put it that way. Your shape and your ass.”

“Most men like my C-cups.”

“They’re very touchable.” He gently petted her jugs.

“Thanks. Why did you not look at my tits much?”

“You know how... do you like porn?”

“Not that much, they got some hotties and not just the women.”

“Really. Well, back to what I was trying to say.” He closed his eyes, collected his thoughts and continued, “I’ve never really loved tits... I like ‘em on a lover, but.”

“It’s not a fetish?”

“Fetish may be the wrong word, but you might be right. Anyway from the first time my friends and I hacked a porn site to look at some naked women, I was the only one who didn’t drool over tits. I loved close shaved pussy, bald is good, but a crew cut on her pussy hair... fucking gorgeous. I don’t mean to sound critical when I say that. I mean when I fucked you from behind... you gave me the best lay. I’m smart enough to know the difference between hot and untouchable and a fuckable woman. Visual and sexual eroticism each has their place.”

“What do you mean sexual eroticism?”

“Actually going to 2nd base or beyond as opposed to looking and photograph of her naked self. I may have had only 4 times of sex before tonight, with one or more sex act total. Apologies to Billy from Arkansas, oral sex is sex.” (He broke Arkansas into syllables this way: ar-kans-as).

“Who’s Billy from Arkansas?” She too pronounced it as Joe just because was too worn out from being sexed and liquored to realize he was mispronouncing Arkansas.

“Ex-President Clinton.”

“Oh... what were you saying?”

“Oh, I meant to say, I may not have much experience with fucking but even I see the difference between pictures and vids and actual sex. Touch is more important then look. A naked hottie could kiss with lizard lips, but if she’s just a picture to your sexlife it doesn’t matter. A friend who fucks you... I mean, she could be ugly, but if she tastes good, gives good head and a joy to fuck, whether or not she’s ugly doesn’t matter, whether or not the fucking hurts the friendship is the big issue... more important than orgasms.” He meant to pause on the amount one paused for a comma, but gave an extra long pause. He meant to add the word ‘even’ as well but his throat became very dry.

He excused himself, drank several handfuls of water, and did his nighttime routine. Jezebel did her nighttime routine. They, too, made no effort to cover themselves. Hank closed his eyes incompletely and watched Jezebel's hot bod move (focusing more at crotch/ass level). Hank was even more of a crotch and ass lover than Joe. Freya was a good several inches taller but still cuddled Hank in a way that just relaxed him. Jezebel's hot ass and hairy muff really swelled Hank’s cock (Hank loved wild and wooly muffs -- but only the downy kind of wooly muffs, no steel wooly muffs for him). The alcohol had it’s sleep-evoking effect magnified by Freya’s relaxing touch (she had no idea nor intention to make him fall asleep, but she make it happen).

To dress herself for sleep, Jezebel slipped on her panties and oversized touristy t-shirt she bought early that day. She had to be 5 to 6 times drunk as she was to comfortably fall asleep naked. Jezebel kissed Joe passionately before falling asleep. She looked at Joe’s nubile body as she drifted off, not because he was the most gorgeous man in the room to her eyes (to her he was), but this put her back to the other bed (and to look at any other body would bring guilty feelings). He forgot his pillow and Jezebel wanted a second pillow. Joe surrendered his pillow on one condition: he could rest his head on her chest. She agreed and was asleep before he drooled.

At about 3 am, Jezebel heard a groan, pissing, water running, then soft squishy sounds, soft sounds of a pleased man and Jezebel fell back into a lighter sleep. At this time, Freya stood with a groan, pissed in the toilet while drinking a glass of water she’d drawn just before she sat. She tried to ignore a painfully parched throat. She was out of her brain too far flush or wipe or wash. She drew and guzzled a second glass of water, drew a third, but carried that to bed. Hank’s ancestry was a mix of mostly German and Danish (about twice as much Dane than German). His blonde pubes revealed his natural hair color really was the shade of blonde made infamous by the actors who Lucius and Draco Malfroy in the Harry Potter movies (but Hank’s hair was short and styled for business rather than either Malfroy’s long, more androgynous, hairstyle). Hank had kicked the covers off because his body was adapted to cold and Freya’s naked body at his side was more than enough extra heat. Freya had too much Incan and Swede in her ancestry to be bothered by what passed for the cold of February in New Orleans.

Freya decided she was going to give head with just her mouth, no hands. She reached over Hank’s bod and pulled her pillow over his chest and dropped it in position as a kneeler. She clasped her hands behind her back and used her tongue to move a 10cm limp dick in her mouth. At this point she could take him all the way in barely. Hank mewed in pleasure, he dream quickly shifted from the black coworker he had been arguing with to them had settled differences and she was sucking his dick. Hank’s eyes opened before his dream lover got him very far. Freya now had 12cm of his 17cm and semi-hard dick in her mouth. After another 10 second of sucking his dick was at it’s max length (22cm and so much thicker than most so it sometimes looked a bit shorter than it really was). Freya averaged only about half of it in her mouth and couldn’t get more than about 6 of his inches in. Hank had so much pent up need for release that he begged her to slow down. She gave a mischievous grin and kept sucking. Hank whispered, “Don’t bother, I’m cumming.” and started shoot jizz as soon as he stopped speaking. Freya swallowed, tried to keep a mouth full, but some slid down his cock. After he finished, she put a hand on his cock, disimpaled herself and swallowed just a little of her mouthful, twirling her tongue in the remaining cum, savoring his flavor. She decided she enjoyed the taste. After about 20 seconds the flavor started to change (for the slightly worse) and that’s when she swallowed.

Freya stood and moved to the end table, drank a swallow of water. Hank grabbed the glass and whispered, “may I?”

“Okay.” Freya was really uncertain, “That might have--” Hank downed the entire glass including a few drops of his own cum (he didn’t notice), but she did. “I’ll get you another glass of water.” and filled his promise/her glass.

Freya followed, “I know most men like a long, draw out blow job, but I just wanted to see if I could do a zero-to-sixty suck job.”

“That was intense. And after you have just given my first quickie suck and first wake me with head, I enjoyed it.”

“But you enjoy the ‘me suck you long time’ ones better?” she made a Southeast Asian accent for ‘me suck you long time’ without realizing what this was from (it’s just something she had head several times).


“I’ll give you one of those later.”


“I hope you take this the way I intend...” Then she snapped at him quietly, “Eat me.” She took possession of his right wrist, tapped his lips with random fingers and said, “Here.” and held his hand to her rapidly moistening crotch, “Here.”

Hank swept her off her feet, bounced her off the bed, grabbed both hands and pulled her until her ass was half hanging off the bed and in the spot he needed to use the same kneeler she did. He sank to his knees and just dove in. She laid back and luxuriated. Joe tried to eat, and sometimes did especially well (Joe was enthusiastic and had never stayed down for less than 20 minutes), Hank, on the other hand, ate cunt like an experienced whore whose clients only wanted muff dives.

He started with licking her thighs (kneecap to labia, right leg then left), following his tongue with strong hands and making her sigh with contentment. She was feeling relaxed but not actually very wet for the moment. He licked her labia and smiled at her. He penetrated her twat with his tongue and just looked into her eyes. Freya just spread her legs and gave him all the access his tastebuds could handle. She ran her fingers through his straight blonde hair. She luxuriated and moaned softly, “Good boy, lick it up.”

He ate her to a quick near orgasm, then he took his mouth from her crotch, closed her legs, laid side by side and Frenched her. She just melted. She Frenched him, grappled him and ground her crotch into his. She rubbed the shaft of his dick against her clit and was in heaven. They hugged and took a breather. Her belly hurt because she puked a few hours earlier and hadn’t put much of anything into it. This feeling was too good to stop for a little bellyaching.

“I need to cum, just go down on me. I don’t care I last a few second, just make me cum.”

He returned to his carpet munching position. Freya’s pussy was a ‘short hair kitty’ and she just loved getting the tongue bath. She writhed as he continued so slurp and lick. He just couldn’t position himself to breathe through his nose and he too panted through his mouth. Hot breath over wet pussy lips just got her randier and randier. He finished her with 2 finger (she was too tight to take any more than two).

Freya grabbed a pillow to prepare for the screaming orgasm that she’s beginning to feel and was hoping would soon arrive. Freya felt dizzy... much dizzier than she’s ever felt before during or immediately after cumming.

He just continued eating, smiling at her with his eyes. She writhed and his ego felt more and more stroked as he alone (no toys, not “special liquids” from any bottle or anything else outside himself and Freya were involved). He watched her as she got off and this made him very aroused. Freya was about to have another series of orgasms, “Oh please don’t stop!”

Freya arched her back screamed into the pillow and fainted all as she squirted a high pressure ribbon of fluid giving Hank a facial of girl cum. Hank was shocked and pleasantly surprised. He was hoping to bed another squirter before he died. Freya began to recover and teared up thinking she pissed on the man who just gave her the best muff dive of her life. She sobbed quietly as she wiped his beaming face clean with the sheets. She made unintelligible, long form apologies as she did this. “Freya, thank you.”

“I’m sorry I pissed on you... I didn’t mean to.”

“You’re a squirter. Oh, that felt good. If we can get together again. You don’t have to return the favor if you squirt.”

“You enjoyed?” Hank eagerly kissed her lips, shocking and mildly disgusting her. She held Hank to her tit. She laid down holding Hank to her with Hank using her only tit as a pillow.

“Penny for your thoughts.” Hank prompted.

“Keep your penny... best orgasm of my life. I could go another decade or two without getting a better lay and I could still have a fulfilling sex life... that’s how over the top you’ve performed. You’re the shortest guy I’ve ever had any interest in or vice versa... shortest from soles to crown, that is.” Grabbing his penis for effect, “This is so long I couldn’t keep more than half of it in my mouth for more than a moment. I’m swampy wet and horny, get on your back I wanna try a new position.”

Hank asked, “What position?”

Freya thought, “Ride him cowgirl?” She straddled him, facing her ass to Hank’s face.

“This is reverse cowgirl. Would you like me to wear a rubber?”

“No, I want to feel your cum. After you cum, carry me into the shower.”

“Okay. Mount up.” He aimed his semihard cock at her teenage cunt. She yiped a higher-pitch-than-a-chuhuahua’s squeak and breathed raggedly through something between discomfort and pain.

“Fuck you’re huge.” She whispered.

“Give your body a chance to adjust.” Hank advised. It was selfish advise. She had a virgin’s tightness (or at least as close as Hank has even fucked). He needed all his willpower to not explode then and there.

“You’re growing... I’m not sure I can take this.”

“Shh... give it to the count of 1000. I want you to concentrate on counting to 1000 in a different way.”


“One, 2, 4, 7, 11, 16, 22... see the pattern.”


“Instead of adding 1 each time, you add one more than you did last time. Start at 1, then add one to the number, then added two to the previous sum, then added 3....”

“Okay.” Math was Freya’s most difficult subject. ‘Basic 4 math’ was the highest level of mathematics she could teach if she was forced to teach someone mathematics. There was a method behind Hank’s request. She focused so hard adding the numbers that she her panic about his size was less in the front of her mind. Hank so concentrated on keeping her answers correct that he kept himself from creaming all up and down her love canal within a moment.

After this respite, she bounced some and tried to twist from facing his feet to being able to prostrate herself on top of him and French kiss him. Since her pussy had to be stretched in width as well as depth, this grabbed and twisted his cock too. Hank made a half whimpering noise shortly after she was half way from the full half-rotation she needed to do.

Freya’s pussy was now on fire. “Stand, let’s do this position.” She bent over, putting two hands on the bed, straddling her legs wide. Her chest faced the floor, this wasn’t doggie style per say, but Hank’s favorite straight sex positions were reverse cowgirl, butterfly and anything resembling doggie where he can get an unobstructed view of either of his two favorite parts: ass and very hairy pussy. Freya’s nearly bald pussy made him feel a little like a child molester: Her lady looked so young without her beard, to turn a euphemism. He jumped at the chance to jump her like this. Freya moaned softly as he fucked her. He was doing something to her pussy. She didn’t try to hold back her first orgasm. “Freya, ever coordinate orgasms?”

“No, not deliberately.”

“Try to hold back...”

“I’m about to cum, I hold the next one.” She let her arms collapse and her ass stuck even higher relative to her head. She sighed loudly. These weren’t huge O’s but they were pure pleasure. She was being quiet enough that no other room, not even the Japanese honeymooners who woke up and were quietly fucking each other next room over for an hour, knew anyone else up and fucking, but loud enough for everyone in the next bed to hear.

Jezebel shook her head and breathed a sentence with disappointment, “Ah fuck, she’s a pure breeder.”

“What’s that mean?” Joe asked, while taking mental notes what was getting Freya off.

“Breeder someone who’ll engage in heterosex. Pure breeder means a breeder that isn’t the least bit bi.”

“Oh... how can you tell?”

“She needs the cock to cum.”

“So, is that a fun position for you?”

“Not really. I’ve gotten off in that position once out of about 13 times and that was a small orgasm, I’ll assume it to give a man I’m with some fun. Butterfly and either kind of cowgirl... those really get me off. Frisk me position, had never done much for me until last night, thank you for that, by the way. Don’t know how, but I got off more then in that position than I have in any other position in my life. Why I let you have your fun like that was I knew you wanted to eat your cum out of my quim and I knew you were going to really get me off with that move.”

“I only two questions. What’s a quim? And what’s butterfly position?”

“Quim is another name for pussy. Butterfly position is this...” She stood put the back of her legs against the bed, then sat and reclined. “Except imagine my ass at the edge of her bed.”

Jezebel's legs were splayed out at the knees and her heels and big toes were together. She still wore the panties and oversized shirt she slept. Jezebel was 6 feet tall. Joe laid down parallel to her. “If I start anything you don’t want, just push my hands away.” Jezebel watched with interest as he tugged her panties down her long silky, slinky legs. She’s wondering what Joe was planning. Freya did something she never did before, try to address Jezebel. Freya held her tail high not luxuriating, but liking the pounding. “Joe, this is Hank; Hank, that’s Joe. Who’s your fuck buddy?”

Joe took a moment, “Jezebel, that’s Freya; Freya, Jezebel.”

Freya bowed her head so her lips couldn’t be read and said quietly, “A more apropos name for you isn’t known to modern man.” She looked up to see Joe face first in Jezebel's cunt... she knew that had to feel good. “Hey Jezebel, he working you well?”

“Oh yea. You should try this.” Jezebel took Joe’s cock in about 13cm first plunge, then all the way to the balls on her second. Jezebel made yummy sounds with Joe’s just less than 7 inches all in.

“Oh yea. He gives good. His cock tastes good too, Never tried both at the same time... how do you not choke from the distraction?” She looked over her shoulder, “All I need is to feel your white fountain and make me cum for real like porn queen fakes.” She got a little dizzy. Hank pulls out only part way and attempts to stimulate her clit from inside her love canal. She started panting like a two-legged bitch in heat and had a squirting orgasm. That made Hank pop. She went prone, face down, and just quivered with a ‘grand mal’ orgasm. Hank called this orgasm 'grand mal' because it looked a grand mal epileptic seizure when the woman cums. After his second squirt of the 5 shots he’d fire this time. He shot her in the back (her hair, her spine where her floating ribs met the spine behind her abdomen. The last squirt was anemic non-squirt and dripped onto her ass. He wiped his cock on her ass cheeks and reached over to her torso and let his cock bump her sphincter as he rubbed his cum into her skin. He moved down (closer to her ass) and rubbed more cum into her skin. He finally got to her ass and rubbed her ass for a long long time.

No one noticed the maid tapping on the door. But when the maid walked in, she shrieked in shock, embarrassment and surprise. Joe pulled away the delicious pussy he was having to say, “You may stay and watch if you’d like.” Then repeated his words in Spanish choosing a phrasing that were typically used by native speakers or long time residents.

“No, gracias, no.” The maid was blushing from head to toe.

Joe went back to munching carpet. He wasn’t able to put as much attention as he wanted because he was at a ‘weird angle’ (i.e. an angle he never thought eating puss from) and being distracted by Jezebel’s deep throat. Eventually Joe splayed himself on his back and submitted to her mouth’s attention. For her part, Jezebel, took his cock out of her mouth, got prone (tits pressed on the bed). Took 3 repositionings to get her mouth over his cock and used her gums and tongue to get the head of his cock into her mouth. “I’ve never had such a blow before. You’re not using your hands at all...” He whispered, “I wish... nevermind, the comment is too unseemly.”


“I’ll tell you after, could you swallow every drop, pretty please.”

“I’ll try.”

“That’s all I ask.” Freya had progressively swallowed more and more of his cum every blow job she did to completion (not that she’d done that many yet, but Freya seemed desirous to swallow every drop, perhaps if he shot less cum she’d swallow every drop).

Joe luxuriated at Jezebel's oral technique. Joe spoke soft praises to Jezebel about her compassion, her suction, her attention to detail and desire to please. Freya looked at her competition sucking Joe’s dick. She had a bad angle, all she could easily see in Joe’s head and her cunt and ass. She laid there and let Hank just rub her ass more... that kept her ‘warmed’. Freya sat up, took hold of Hank’s hand, sucked Hank’s cum off his fingers. “Wanna watch a Jezebel give a blow job?” She lead Hank by the hand, until they got in a good viewing spot. She then stood behind Hank, giving him a reach around as she looked over his shoulder (being more than 14 cm taller than him, this wasn’t difficult). Freya looked at Joe’s face and realized he was immensely enjoying himself. Freya looked at his crotch, Freya was incredulous the Jezebel had every millimeter of his cock in her mouth. Spit was slowly oozing from her lips and she breathed long and slow, swallowing slowly and repeatedly. “Okay, Jezebel, I have to know how the suck you give head like that.”

Jezebel had to take his cock out of her mouth and laugh at Freya’s choice of words. “Which cock do you wanna swallow, his or his?” She pointed at Hank and Joe in that order.

“Joe’s.” She let go of Hank’s cock. She whispered, “Hank, he’s significantly shorter. Please don’t take it personally, but if I try this, I wanna give myself every chance to succeed first time.”

“Joe do you object?”

“No, Freya gives great head, I’m sure Hank agrees.”

“Oh, she does... she seems tense, especially in her throat.” Hank volunteered.

“I know.” Freya said, “I really don’t want to fuck up.” She tried to suck Joe. Jezebel whispered, "relax your throat... go ahead, slowly do that... yes, good, good.”

“She’s relaxing.”

“Go ahead and swallow... it’ll suppress the gag reflex.”

“Oh, Freya... you’re getting me hot. If you want to give a long slow blow... slack up, otherwise I’m going to bust a nut soon. Oh, fuck... yes. I like the slow blows, but this speed suck feels wonderful... Oh Freya... you’ve taken me all the way in.” Joe propped up on his elbows to watch her suck with his cock fully past her lips.

She just sorta smiled at Joe and that just made him pop, “I’m cumming.” She gave a cough, backed out. She didn’t want to just swallow it, she wanted to taste it. Joe’s didn’t taste as good... oh well. She swallowed quickly, even sucked the last drops out of his cock. “Thank you.” He Frenched her. “Hank, Jezebel, could one of you French those lips as I French these.” He stroked her mons. She scooted herself to the edge of the bed. He started to eat her, but she wouldn’t get much wetter and her interest in sex dipped. “What’s wrong, Freya?”

“I’m fucked out... I’ve got fucked so much.”

“Okay.” Joe replied he knew Freya sensed his disappointment but might confuse it with a different emotion. “First, I believe you. Guys can get blue balls, I suppose there’s a point where women just can’t do the equivalent of ‘getting it up’.”

“What’s blue balls?”

“A guy who has sex until he runs out of cum is said to have blue balls.” Joe addressed them all, “Let’s bet breakfast.”

Joe pulled his boxer’s on and said, “Hank. No hard feelings. I seriously doubt that Freya’s and my romance will survive this, but we’ve been friends for over almost two years and this won’t kill the friendship. I’m not going to try to stake a claim on Jezebel. If you wanna chase either of them, go for it. I’ll be out of circulation for a few weeks, letting the utter weirdness -- bad word to describe -- uh, unprecedented? (too asexual) uhm... improbable and weird (horribly inaccurate, but’ll need to do).”

“You won’t. Honestly, don’t downcheck your relationship yet... she definitely has feelings for you, whether they’re vile or good--”

“Both. Trust me, knowing her two years or so. There’s no doubt, both. I was honestly thinking about seeing if she was willing to try couple’s therapy. Our university has a Psy.D. program with Psy.D. students, i.e. already having their more shit degree in psychology and going for the narrower focused baby brother of the psychology doctorates. Anyway, these students do therapy sessions and used as classroom fodder.”


“Sub ideal, I know, but it’s a low dough option.”

“Broach it with her.”



Hank and Jezebel got dressed more slowly plus Joe and Freya realized they were very hungry. Freya didn’t want to overdo breakfast, she felt like shit while waiting for the first parade of the day, so Joe checked out early and said to the staff, “Freya isn’t feeling well.” They didn’t charge him out of sympathy and because they had a 10 person waiting list for additional rooms.

Freya hit the school clinic when they arrived (on Monday). The school had a 2 day Mardi Gras holiday (only 1 MD at the clinic that day) and no student shrinks available until classes were back in session, i.e. Wednesday. Wednesday morning, they saw a shrink trainee named Karen. She had a prudish look about her, but she didn’t blush as they gave details of each of their trysts in full view of the other. Karen gave them ‘homework’ to write down everything they feel about the others, good and bad things. In about four weeks from the day after Mardi Gras day (their first appointment), Freya’s period had been 4 weeks late and arrived with twice the total volume, but four days earlier her pregnancy test came back positive. She was relieved that the ‘error proof test’ had a high but less then 100% accuracy rate and repeated hers after the period and it came back negative. She assumed this meant it was a false positive. Freya’s and Joe’s sexual relationship fell apart but their friendship remained, albeit strained for a while. Joe didn’t date for several months and Freya didn’t date for over a year.

Rating: 50%, Read 7533 times, Posted Mar 02, 2014

Fiction | Cum Swallowing, Drug, Exhibitionism, Reluctance


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